Today, the fast of Esther, is the first anniversary of my biopsy and cancer diagnosis.
I had my blood work from the fifth day in my Thyrogen stimulated blood test series drawn this morning.
The results aren't likely to change anything. The probability that my thyroglobulin level went down is pretty much non existent. The probability that it went up is high.
But today I pray. I wait. I pray. I look back over last year and my assertions that I would not let them do another major neck surgery on me. On the one hand am glad I said bli nedder (that I wasn't making a vow) and on the other hand I remember why. I am waiting for my miracle. Let the numbers go down. Let the last set of labs be an error. Please. I beg. I cry. I laugh. I smile. God can do anything.
I have learned from my previous experiences and if, God forbid, we have to go ahead with surgery, we will have to have a post op pain plan in hand before surgery. An electric adjustable bed for the time in the hospital after surgery is imperative. I will not be afraid of addiction from taking my pain medication as needed post op.
What ever I am to do I will do.
As I am typing it has just stated to rain. Rain in Israel is a powerful thing. It is a sign of blessing. It is a gift. It is clearly our life blood and directly sustains us.
I don't expect test results until tomorrow noon at the soonest. That gives us a lot of time for rain, prayer and it means I will be here, online refreshing my computer screen, waiting for the results to come in, and trying to smile despite the worry.
Prayers for me; Chaya Liba bas Sorah, that my miracle comes. That this year my news is better than last year. Please pray for rain, lots of rain.
Sending lot of prayers your way. Praying for your miracle! May God guide you and your doctors toward the best treatment option to rid your body of all illness. I love you and will continue to pray!
ReplyDeleteI love Esther! I had no idea about the fast, but I love reading about how the Lord used her to save her people.
ReplyDeleteI was thinking, as I read your blog, that maybe, just maybe, thyroid cancer is allowed, "for such a time as this." We don't understand the ways of the Lord, we know they are His ways. His thoughts and ways are higher. We don't always understand His thoughts when it means we need to suffer. He didn't reveal His plan to Esther, He doesn't need to reveal it to us. We can wait in faith, as she did.
But, we have that privilege to pray and to ask, and bask in His love and His everlasting Arms, until the prayers are answered.
Praying for you, friend!