The last two nights were a bit rough. The days weren't bad, but the muscle cramps and tingling weren't letting me sleep. I don't always make great decisions when I am exhausted, so despite my body's obvious signs I finally fell asleep at 8am yesterday. I slept from 8 until after 10am. At my doctor's office the last pickup for the lab is 10am, so that was that. The only other option for blood tests was the ER, and we all know how I feel about the hospital, right?
This morning I got up and went. This evening I got IV instead of going to my daughter's dance recital. My younger daughter went and we are buying the CD of the performance, but I still feel incredibly guilty. The performance was at 6pm on one side of the city and the only doctor's appointment I could get was 6:30pm on the other. I tried, but it didn't work out.
My daughter understands, or at least seemed to, but that doesn't make me feel better.
I made her an eclair when she got home, to celebrate her performance. It made me feel a tad bit better. I am not sure how she is really feeling. Adolescents emotions aren't easy to read.
Being a mother isn't easy. Having to make this kind of choice really stinks. Frosting on the cake, I am numb again. The IV helped for a couple hours, but I am feeling way too close to how I felt before the IV now, four hours later.
Either way, sleeping or crying, I will be spending some time with my pillow tonight.
Oh man! Does this mean you are not joining me tomorrow???? Again?????
ReplyDelete(how's that for not being sympathetic, and just thinking of myself????)
ps. I have what to say about this post, but not now... I am too tired to respond coherently!
ReplyDeleteit saddems me to here of your relaps in syptoms.
ReplyDeleteI'm in your neck of the woods (on Chabad street in bet - and you have my mobile)until the end of the week if you find you can muster koach for a bikur cholim visit/get-together.
I hope to see you Mikimi.
ReplyDelete